Some are born into greatness and some have greatness thrust upon them. Well, this guy has been great from the start and has shown it every step of the way. He will prove it to everyone when he crosses the finish line, probably this weekend well ahead of any of his competitors.
Hush Puppy IV has a mater turning and is about 1 1/2 days behind our future champion.
As a side note, no harm came to the mater over night by the ninja squirrels. And, the squirrel dog was too full to eat his breakfast this morning. I noticed that he had some fuzzies on his chin. Wonder where that came from?
5 comments:
Ah Mater Master you sure do have a red one!
BUT... that mater aint no 9". No way no how. That's just a lil baby red. Why he's no bigger than a tomato leaf! He's so cute to blush cause you've been telling him he's the winner but at some point you are going to have to break the news to him and it aint gonna be pretty. He may even need therapy. (Is his name Cherry did you say?)
And just as I was headed to the store to buy your beer... Maybe I should pick up some Miracle Gro for you instead?? You gonna need a miracle to get that little guy to 9"!! Hope #2 has some size on him!
(Your dog must have been eating dandelions cause my squirrels turned around and came home last night. They told me there wasn't much to eat in your garden yet.)
Have you been eating "Loco Weed?" Your sense of perspective and proportion (although never very accurate) have been badly affected by something. Maybe you have been blinded by disappointment...
I'm not sure which but I hear that "crow" doesn't go down so well, and you are about to take one hellava bite of "Crow." This bad boy is well over 9" in circumference and when I pick him I will show you. But as I said earlier, I ain't messing with him until then. Don't want to knock him off the bush and you call FOUL.
Nope, he is going all the way to the finish line, and ahead of everyone else.
I haven't claimed victory yet so I don't need to present the numbers yet. But I will soon and you will be making those trips to the beer store - once to buy my victory prize for winning "The Great Tomato Race" and several times to get something to wash that nasty taste of CROW out of your mouth! Cause it will stay in there a long time.
All the while, I will be tasting "Sweet Victory" and that refreshing flavor of Yuengling. I'll be waiting for you at the Finish Line.
Oooh Mater Master you better not pick him before you are crowned victor! That's one of the contest rules, the mater must be "still attached to the vine" with a measuring tape around his tummy. (That keeps the threat of farmers market purchases low.) Ah, I should have let you pick him and send me the photo... then we'd disqualify that little shrimp. But I'm a nice guy.
I think my perspective is spot on. Shrimpie is no fatter than the width of your mater leaves. And unless he's sitting on "Jack's beanstalk", in real life he's not too many sizes bigger than his branch. Nope I don't buy it.
It's all making sense now.. you don't want to risk knocking him off with a little flimsy measuring tape? Nah, you're just hoping and praying he gets bigger before my monster maters turn. We shall see.
PS - I eat CROW for breakfast, I'm good.
It will be too late when your currently GREEN monsters finally get around to making the change to red. Nope, you don't have a snowball's chance in He-- of taking this one.
I know this is agonizing for you to look at my mater and realize that there is nothing you can do to avoid defeat. I think it would be good therapy for you to sit down, with pen in hand and express you true feelings. Then crunch up the paper and throw it away.
Then take out a blank piece of paper and start writing your speech of concession, apology and congratulations to me. That should help you deal with all this pent up anger. And that way you will be prepared when you receive my proof that Lush Puppy V has won this contest. It will hurt less that way.
It's OK, I understand the pain, but you and your GREEN monsters are going down!
Ah... my bad. I thought I was supposed to write down my feelings on "your blog". Ooops I guess I also missed the part about throwing them away.
Sigh.. okay I'll start my concession speech. I might even be able to squeeze out an apology somewhere.
JUST AS SOON AS YOU MEASURE SHRIMPY!!
Lol
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